Friday, January 7, 2011

Looking ahead



The other day, I had a revelation about why my life seems to speed ahead now. I live my life a month at a time, sometimes a quarter of a year at a time.

I had my calendar out trying to make plans for a writing workshop I've scheduled in February, set up an art class in March, a new gallery opening in April. There was a whole third of the year in my head.

As an accounting person, I have to do this at work too: January 31, February 28, March 15, April 15 and 30th...and so on through the year. I'm planning my job a quarter at a time.

I do this on a monthly basis too. I write down all the definites: writing class, yoga, birthdays, doctors' appointments. Then I look at the blank days and nights and fit in dinner with friends, trips to Greensboro to deal with my dad's estate, R&R weekends at the coast.

The time flies.

We all know how it was when we were young. We lived one day at a time, the anticipatory moments few and far between. Birthdays, vacations, Christmas. They took forever to get here.

So is it that my life is too busy? That I have to schedule too rigidly? That there aren't enough big things to look forward to, just little moments of happiness in the sea of obligations?

The time is precious now - I'm almost 60 years old - and I don't want to waste any of it. I want to think that I'm making good use of my days and weeks; I just wish they went by a little less quickly.

NOTE: The photograph is of one of my daughter's handmade datebooks. An excellent way to keep up with the year. You can find them at Rockpile Bindery

2 comments:

Working Mystic said...

I'm only 36 and my life is flying by the same way. I have things I want to accomplish for the year and I break them down by quarter, month, week, even day. Then the whole year rushes by.

A few years ago, I accepted that I'm a goal monger, and I cut myself some slack.

The trick is to savor every moment of every activity. Roll around in it and really be there.

The glitch is when I don't want to be there. ACK!

mamie said...

I think you make a great point, WM, and one that I've thought about too. We have to revel in the moments as the days fly by! And of course, the bad news is that when we don't want to be there, time goes by really slowly. :)